Every 14 seconds, somewhere in the world a woman learns she has breast cancer. A breast cancer diagnosis can quickly turn you into an expert on subjects you previously knew nothing about, like how to manage chemotherapy mouth sores or how many ways there are to reconstruct breasts after mastectomy.
Of course, hindsight is twenty-twenty. Many women are caught off guard by their diagnosis, treatment side effects, or the many ways in which this disease can change the body.
Here, four breast cancer survivors share what they wish they’d known before their diagnosis. Their stories could help you be more prepared if you or a loved one is ever faced with a breast cancer diagnosis.
1. Breast Cancer Doesn’t Always Run in Your Family
In fact, most women who are diagnosed don’t have any family history of breast cancer. As long as you have breasts, you can get breast cancer (and that includes men).
Megan-Claire Chase expected to get cancer, just not this one. Ovarian cancer was the one that ran in her family. Her mother was diagnosed with ovarian cancer while pregnant with her. When doctors told her she had invasive lobular carcinoma in 2015, she replied, “I have what?”
“I was not prepared for breast cancer,” says Chase, who is now a patient advocate and writer in Atlanta.
2. A Lump Isn’t the Only Symptom
In fact, most breast cancers don’t manifest with a palpable lump. Chase felt like something strange was going on with her health for two-and-a-half years, but doctors couldn’t find the cause. By the time she felt a lump in her breast, her cancer had reached stage 2A. “I felt validated,” she says. “I knew something wasn’t right.”
10 Things I Wish I’d Known Before My Breast Cancer Diagnosis
We've explored essential insights on breast cancer from survivors' perspectives, emphasizing the importance of awareness, preparation, and emotional support.
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3. Being Healthy Doesn’t Completely Protect You
Teri Gandy-Richardson’s stage 2 breast cancer diagnosis in 2016 blindsided her. The yoga instructor in Brooklyn, New York, thought she was doing everything right. “I was living a healthy, active lifestyle and eating pretty healthy,” she says. “So that was kind of a shock.”
She learned that even if you’re in good health and have zero risk factors, you can still get breast cancer (although exercising and being at a healthy weight may lower the risk).
4. The Outlook Can Be Better Than You Think
Learning you have cancer can stir up a lot of fear and anxiety about your future. “When you get that diagnosis, you think it’s a death sentence. That’s just where your mind automatically goes,” says Gandy-Richardson.
In reality, when breast cancers are found early — as hers was — the prognosis is excellent. The odds of surviving for at least five years when the cancer hasn’t spread from the breast is 99 percent, according to the American Cancer Society.
5. You May Need Financial Help — and It’s Available
The first year of breast cancer treatment cost an average of almost $35,000 in 2020. How much you end up spending varies based on your cancer stage and which treatments you receive.
But even with good insurance coverage, copays and other out-of-pocket costs can make treatment unaffordable. In a 2022 survey of 1,437 people with breast cancer, 47 percent said their out-of-pocket costs were a “significant or catastrophic burden.”
Soon after Chase was diagnosed, she wondered, How am I going to afford this? When it came to finding financial assistance, the social worker at her cancer hospital turned out to be “a godsend.” She pointed Chase to nonprofit organizations like the Patient Advocate Foundation, which helped fund her 16 rounds of chemo.
These are some other organizations that offer financial assistance for everything from copayments to fertility treatments:
Nausea, vomiting, and hair loss are well-known side effects of cancer treatment, but Chase was shocked by the black splotches that appeared on her palms and on the soles of her feet. The pain in her teeth also took her by surprise.
“They tell you that you might get mouth sores, but they don’t tell you that your teeth will actually ache. I didn’t know what was wrong,” says Chase. Her doctor eventually explained that these were lesser-known side effects from chemotherapy.
7. Healing Isn’t a Linear Process, and You Won’t Be the Same When Treatment Is Over
After undergoing mastectomy for stage 1 ductal carcinoma in situ (DCIS) in 2019, Eve Wilson pushed herself to get well. She’s since learned that the process of healing from breast cancer surgery isn’t always linear.
“It takes as long as it takes, and it goes far deeper than just physical healing,” says Wilson, who is the codirector of Awakened Lifestyles, a personal coaching company in Brisbane, Australia. “The breast cancer journey was really a seven-year process, and I wish I hadn’t expected so much of myself in terms of recovering sooner.”
Chase learned that even though treatments can eradicate your cancer, you won’t necessarily return to your former self. Eight years after her treatment, she still has nerve damage and overwhelming fatigue. Even the texture of her hair is different. “It was really hard for me to deal with the fact that I will never revert back to my precancer body,” she says.
8. There’s More Than One Way to Do Breast Reconstruction
You have choices when it comes to breast reconstruction after mastectomy: Flap surgery, implants, or going flat. Wilson opted for flap surgery, a procedure that used skin and fat from her belly to rebuild her breast.
“It has been truly life-changing, and I highly recommend looking into this if you don’t want to have implants in your body,” she says of the procedure. Gandy-Richardson chose implant surgery because she wanted to preserve the muscles in her abdomen.
9. Self-Care and Emotional Support Are Critical
Gandy-Richardson came into her diagnosis already tired and burned out. Having cancer forced her to take a second look at self-care. “I reinstated my Netflix account. I ordered a bunch of books,” she says. She also learned a type of yoga designed for cancer patients, aptly named yoga4cancer, which she now teaches. It was a good strategy, considering the evidence that regular exercise improves survival after a breast cancer diagnosis.
And no one knows what it’s like to live with breast cancer better than someone who’s had it. The place to find fellow cancer warriors is in a support group, Chase discovered. “There was such a camaraderie,” she says. “We were very real with each other, which I think is missing when we’re seeking support from our family members and friends outside of cancer land.”
She joined a local support group in Atlanta as well as a few virtual ones. “You really can make connections. I call them my ‘cancer besties,’” she says. “Cancer is what brought us together, but then we actually developed true friendships.”
10. You Are Strong Enough
Even for a trained cancer surgeon, a breast cancer diagnosis can be overwhelming and terrifying. That’s what Lisa Curcio, MD, discovered when she was diagnosed with a rare type of breast cancer called Paget’s disease 24 years ago. “The diagnosis paralyzes you. I don’t care what you know about breast cancer, it’s paralyzing,” she says.
Though she’d had plenty of experience treating cancer in her patients, Dr. Curcio wasn’t sure she could handle it herself. “One thing I learned is you’re always stronger than you think you are,” she says. “I’ve never seen a single patient who’s gone through breast cancer treatment who wasn’t strong enough to do it.”
Her experience inspired her to switch her focus from general cancer surgery to breast cancer surgery. Today she is the medical director of breast surgery at Northern Dutchess Hospital in Rhinebeck, New York, and a medical reviewer for Everyday Health. “My diagnosis really helped me see that it was my calling,” says Curcio.
The Takeaway
A breast cancer diagnosis brings many unexpected challenges and important lessons. From understanding that breast cancer doesn't always stem from family history or lack of a healthy lifestyle to finding financial help for treatments and emotional support critical for recovery, knowledge can dramatically affect your journey. And remember: You’re stronger than you might think.
Ryland Gore, MD, MPH, is a board-certified, fellowship-trained surgeon specializing in breast surgical oncology in Atlanta. She completed her general surgery residency at Rush University Medical Center and John H. Stroger Cook County Hospital in Chicago. She went on to complete her breast surgical oncology fellowship at Maimonides Medical Center in Brooklyn, New York.
In addition to her professional responsibilities, Gore previously served on the board of directors for Every Woman Works, an Atlanta-based nonprofit organization whose mission is to empower women and help them transition into independence and stability from common setbacks. Gore served as the chairwoman of the American Cancer Society’s Making Strides Against Breast Cancer campaign in Atlanta for three years (2019 to 2021). She is currently the co-director of Nth Dimensions’ Strategic Mentoring Program and the alumni board chair of the Summer Health Professions Educational Program (SHPEP), which is a collaborative effort by the Robert Wood Johnson Foundation, Association of American Medical Colleges, and the American Dental Education Association.
Gore is a highly sought after speaker, consultant, and lecturer on breast cancer and breast health, as well as women’s empowerment topics.
Stephanie Watson is a freelance health writer who has contributed to WebMD, AARP.org, BabyCenter, Forbes Health, Fortune Well, Time, Self, Arthritis Today, Greatist, Healthgrades, and HealthCentral. Previously, she was the executive editor of Harvard Women’s Health Watch and Mount Sinai’s Focus on Healthy Aging. She has also written more than 30 young adult books on subjects ranging from celebrity biographies to brain injuries in football.
Everyday Health follows strict sourcing guidelines to ensure the accuracy of its content, outlined in our editorial policy. We use only trustworthy sources, including peer-reviewed studies, board-certified medical experts, patients with lived experience, and information from top institutions.
